Nora Roberts, the romance author, half jokingly says she wants to keep her current man because she’s “got him trained.”

Actually, she’s got it the wrong way around. Like bitches — female dogs — it’s women who need to be trained.

Women are emotional, mercurcial, unreliable creatures. They act in a flighty manner. Men are rocks by comparison. In the Taylor Swift song, “Ready For It,” the singer admits she is wild and erratic, and says that when Yuki, the badass antihero of the song, seizes her, “I’m so very tame now.” Women not only need to be tamed, they want to be tamed. They want to become somewhat rational.

Training woman starts with getting her to respect you. That means putting a big NO in your vocabulary. Can we get window shopping? NO. Can we hang with my friends? NO. Do you want to talk? NO.

Say no frequently and firmly. It’s good for the soul of a man.

(The inverse is true for women: she should learn to say YES to everything he suggests, especially sexually. This is most pleasing.)

Women like to be told no. They like it when you are in clear command. There’s no point in hemming and hawing; let the no leap to your lips.

Next, begin giving her orders.

Make me a sandwich.

Do the laundry.

Clean up the apartment.

If she hesitates on doing any of these things, it’s up to you to decide how to punish her. The ultimate threat is to withdraw from the relationship completely, but there’s no need to bring out the big guns just yet. Only if she persists in non-complying do you need to say “If you don’t start doing what I say, I’m going to leave you.”

There’s all kinds of little tricks and mannerisms you can deploy in your quest to get your woman to follow your lead and be trained. But those will give you some idea of how to proceed. Basically, you need a headspace of “leadership” and constant superiority. If you believe you’re better than her, you’ll proceed accordingly. If, contrary-wise, you think you’re “lucky to have her” and “you don’t know how she puts up with you” you can kiss your happiness goodbye. She’s going to tromple all over you and you won’t know what hit you. You’re ceasing to do the things that interest her. It’s only by following this article to the letter that you have a chance at the good life. If you doubt me, ask yourself how your past relationships went …

This is Xloveli’s virtual home. For more articles like this one, go to website dark.sport.blog — see you there!

TELEPORT TO: The Gross Distortion Room …  The Impalement Chamber For Recalcitrant Pussy …